Riley - Uh-Oh
Uh-oh I thought, this big bird was going to EAT ME! I was scared. I start running away as fast as my little lego legs could carry me. The bird was right behind me. I puffed as I tried to remember what just happened. I was climbing a tree when I saw a bird, he was eating and he saw me. He wanted to eat me. Of course I did not want to be eaten so I ran away. The bird was gonna catch me. HE GOT ME!!!! I was scared he licked his lips. You know what happens next ….
By Riley
Hello Riley,
ReplyDeleteGreat job entering this week's 100 Word Challenge. I really enjoy the way you have written it from the perspective of the Lego figure..she would think that bird was truly massive. Not sure how I would react to something that size! Your use of capital letters to make a point is very clever and really helps the reader feel the character's panic.
Next time think about using a thesaurus to find more exciting words, just imagine all the many words you could have used instead of big...
Keep up the good work.
Hi Riley
ReplyDeleteWell done on a great story! I had to read it really quickly because I wanted to know what happened. You have created a sense of suspence. Keep writing!