Cold, forlorn and unhappy that no-one will be buying presents for me this Christmas, I sit outside wonderful Harley’s Toy Shop with my loyal, trustworthy dog, wishing that I would be able to have a mum and dad for Christmas.
If I had a mum and dad my life would be joyful! Washed clothes, delicious warm food, a warm comfortable bed, kisses and hugs! Toys, goodnight stories and lots of amazing things that could happen.
The kids their are wanting more then they need and I only have myself and fred my dog sometimes I wish I was them.
By Ashley
Hi Ashley I like your first sentence and you have got a lot of vivid verbs. Your story is good you don't need any thing to include well done.
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