Thursday, July 30, 2015

Caitlin - The Abandoned

The abandoned house stands skeletal on the hill.
Lingering light was obliterated by the rapidly falling night. 
The sky changed from pink to purple then to grey washes.
Wind thrashed in the treetops and the clouds burst. 
A torrential rain lashed down as Alex entered the building.
Dust bunnies the size of basketballs welcomed her as she walked across the creaky floor boards.
As she walked time slowed down, her footsteps echo within the walls.
Shafts of light burst through the gaps in the boarded up windows.
Alex sprinted downstairs to the front door, and all she could see was two red eyes.

By Caitlin.

3 comments:

  1. I liked how you said"Alex sprinted down to the front door, and all she could see was two red eyes" at the end because it made me wonder what was going to happen. I do not think you have anything you need to work on.
    Marika...Valley School

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Marika! :D
    Caitlin, Your buddy

    ReplyDelete
  3. I like how you describe your words. Next time don't use to many full stops.

    From madison Broadgreen school room 11.

    ReplyDelete