Monday, May 16, 2016

Week 3 - The big storm by Ava

As I got ready to get into my orange
Wunseys.
Then “BOOM”
I jumped.
I ran to my window and looked out.
There was water flooding the whole entire street.
There were people running for their lives
As I ran outside  to help people get out of the rubble. I swam against the tide then there was another BOOM.
It was a huge storm rain came pouring down.
I was soaked and finely I was finished.
When I got inside mum was worried about me.
So i told her what happened and she was very proud of me.

By Ava

2 comments:

  1. Well done Ava, you have worked well on this piece of writing. I like how you have managed to include all of the words :) Think about where you are putting your punctuation so that the story flows well. Mrs P

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  2. Great story Ava,I like how you said the word rubble.I think that you should use more punctuation next time e:g !!! ,,,and ???
    Viana

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