When I got locked up I felt scared the reason I got put in jail is because i kidnapped a 8 yrs old girl. I sat there and did nothing most of the time i slept, I got given food but not enough I starved I made an escape plan.
When the guard gives me food i will grab him and take the key of their belt and stab him in the neck with a key there was no other way every wall was made out of brick even the floor. Alcatraz was a very bad place why does is even exist
By Vannary
I really enjoyed reading this correct the following thing. Punctuation, when you are making a list use commas, capital letters, there were some missing where you needed them. - Sophia
ReplyDeleteI think you need to check your i's because they have to be capital letters for your I like that so you need to reread you're story. Lily
ReplyDeleteI like how you said you felt but you need to make the hook more interesting because it did not hook me into the story when I read it.
ReplyDelete